On the Night Shift...
It's odd.. Night shifts are strange things...
I've always had a love/hate relationship with working the "midnight" shift. I have to work one every week, and have never really gotten used to it. It's funny how the human body/mind likes a regular schedule. It really doesn't matter how much sleep I get in during the day, I always have a sinking spell sometime during the night. Caffiene can help, but more often than not makes you jinky and even more fatigued when you come off the high.
Right now its 3:15 am and I have until 6 am before my relief gets here. Other than the hum and whistle of electronics I'm alone. Sometimes its nice, other times it can drive you batty. Right now, I'm sort of indifferent to it. After 2 am you are over half way done and it's just a matter of counting down, and withstanding the rest of the hours until you can leave.
Keeping yourself entertained is a must. Most night shifts consist of work the first 3 or so hours, and then only sporadic patches of tasks to complete. You tend to have alot of time where nothing at all is going on, and working in a room all alone and separated from the other skeleton crew in the building it can get boring/monotonous/spooky/lonely.
It tends for me to be introspective time. This can be good, and bad depending on what mood you are in when you get here, or what type of day you had. You run over thoughts in your head, situations that have occured, things people have said or done, etc...
Tonight, my thoughts are about what time period in my life, that if I was able, return to, and start over again...
I'm not sure exactly why thats on my mind tonight. But it is. It's no secret that I haven't been very happy with how my life has gone in the the last few years. I suppose thats a big part of it. I envisioned, and fully expected my life to be vastly different than it currently is. But, through a couple of situations and rash decisions here I am.
At first I would have said I would have gone back just prior to getting married to my ex-wife. But, even though I sacrificed way too much for her and generally allowed myself to be a doormat I can't hang it all on that one situation as the cause and affect for where I am right now (as much as i'd like to )
I guess I'd go back to when I was in my first semester of college way back in the day in 1988. (yes, 1988.. ) I never really thought much about the saying "youth is wasted on the young" but it really is true. The world was at my feet and I didn't even know it.
Instead of clubbing, partying, screwing off, and screwing my brains out, I'd crack a book . I'd take full advantage of the ability to not have to pay rent or a mortgage and get a few financial steps ahead of the spuds mackenzie worshipping heathens I ran with in those days. There are a few hearts I wouldn't have broken, drugs I wouldn't have taken, and lies I woudn't have told. There are more than a few phone numbers of aquaintences I would lose. I wouldn't be so petty in my judgement of my parents, and others who cared for me. I'd spend time with those I know won't be there in the future.
But, I can't do that. It's water that has long since flowed under a million old rickety bridges. Those times are gone and wish as I may, I can never return to them. I can only replay them like worn out old movies and try to learn from them.
Like I said, night shifts are strange.....
I've always had a love/hate relationship with working the "midnight" shift. I have to work one every week, and have never really gotten used to it. It's funny how the human body/mind likes a regular schedule. It really doesn't matter how much sleep I get in during the day, I always have a sinking spell sometime during the night. Caffiene can help, but more often than not makes you jinky and even more fatigued when you come off the high.
Right now its 3:15 am and I have until 6 am before my relief gets here. Other than the hum and whistle of electronics I'm alone. Sometimes its nice, other times it can drive you batty. Right now, I'm sort of indifferent to it. After 2 am you are over half way done and it's just a matter of counting down, and withstanding the rest of the hours until you can leave.
Keeping yourself entertained is a must. Most night shifts consist of work the first 3 or so hours, and then only sporadic patches of tasks to complete. You tend to have alot of time where nothing at all is going on, and working in a room all alone and separated from the other skeleton crew in the building it can get boring/monotonous/spooky/lonely.
It tends for me to be introspective time. This can be good, and bad depending on what mood you are in when you get here, or what type of day you had. You run over thoughts in your head, situations that have occured, things people have said or done, etc...
Tonight, my thoughts are about what time period in my life, that if I was able, return to, and start over again...
I'm not sure exactly why thats on my mind tonight. But it is. It's no secret that I haven't been very happy with how my life has gone in the the last few years. I suppose thats a big part of it. I envisioned, and fully expected my life to be vastly different than it currently is. But, through a couple of situations and rash decisions here I am.
At first I would have said I would have gone back just prior to getting married to my ex-wife. But, even though I sacrificed way too much for her and generally allowed myself to be a doormat I can't hang it all on that one situation as the cause and affect for where I am right now (as much as i'd like to )
I guess I'd go back to when I was in my first semester of college way back in the day in 1988. (yes, 1988.. ) I never really thought much about the saying "youth is wasted on the young" but it really is true. The world was at my feet and I didn't even know it.
Instead of clubbing, partying, screwing off, and screwing my brains out, I'd crack a book . I'd take full advantage of the ability to not have to pay rent or a mortgage and get a few financial steps ahead of the spuds mackenzie worshipping heathens I ran with in those days. There are a few hearts I wouldn't have broken, drugs I wouldn't have taken, and lies I woudn't have told. There are more than a few phone numbers of aquaintences I would lose. I wouldn't be so petty in my judgement of my parents, and others who cared for me. I'd spend time with those I know won't be there in the future.
But, I can't do that. It's water that has long since flowed under a million old rickety bridges. Those times are gone and wish as I may, I can never return to them. I can only replay them like worn out old movies and try to learn from them.
Like I said, night shifts are strange.....
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